On the Record

The folks who bring you Super Lawyers came out this week with a ranking of the top law schools in the country. And it’s dopey.

There. I said it.

The list ranks schools by the number of graduates included on lists of Super Lawyers. Let’s put aside for a second Above the Law’s astute comment that “It’s a little like US Weekly handing out Oscar nominations based on how many times a star has appeared on its cover.”

Many bloggers have pointed out that this gives bigger law schools an advantage because they have more graduates. That’s a major, major flaw in the rankings. (Super Lawyers acknowledges this but downplays its impact.)

Here’s a “for instance”: The University of Maryland is ranked 43 on U.S. News’ list. It’s got 897 law students, according to TaxProf Blog. It ranks 50 in the Super Lawyers list. UC Hastings ranks 39 on U.S. News. It has 1,251 law students. It’s 11 on the Super Lawyers list. I’m not saying size made all the difference in this list, but it had to have had some impact.

Another big problem: Maryland has only two law schools. I’m willing to bet that a huge majority of the lawyers in the state come from one of those two schools and that a somewhat smaller majority of graduates from the two law schools stay in Maryland. When Super Lawyers compiles its list of top Maryland lawyers, a very, very large share of them will be grads of UM or UB–because, well, that’s who’s here. This will not be the case for states with many law schools or states where lots of the lawyers are coming from law schools elsewhere (like New York). Those states will spread the wealth a little more. Perhaps, then, UM is getting an unfair boost in the rankings because it’s one of only two games in town.

All in all, I’ll say it again. The rankings are kind of dopey and not all that useful.

But hey, as the Business Insider Law Review puts it, “lists are fun.”

I received a lovely Edible Arrangements fruit basket at my desk this morning.

Since I can find a law angle to almost anything, I’ll tell you that there was a funny warning label attached to my fruit. It told me, first off, that the arrangement was made with skewers. No kidding! So that’s what those pointy things sticking out of the fruit were.

Then the label told me to “[c]arefully remove fruit with utensil and dispose of fruit skewers immediately.” As opposed to just chomping away with the skewers still attached? But that eliminates all the extra fiber!

Also, “adult supervision [is] required” when children are around the container the arrangement came in. I can’t think of what horrible, deadly thing kids could do with an empty basket, but maybe that’s a failure of imagination on my part.

Finally, the arrangement can only be safely transported in the trunk of the car. “Never allow a passenger to hold arrangement while vehicle is in motion,” I was cautioned. Of course, that’s exactly what most people are going to do, since if it goes in the trunk it might roll around — and horrors, maybe even dislodge one of those lethal skewers!

I cringe to think of the Edible Arrangements-related injuries that must have prompted these over-the-top legal warnings.

There has been a lot of controversy recently about the H1N1 vaccine being made available to prison populations. (Don’t believe me? I did a Google news search to prove it.)

Most notable is the 300 doses being sent to Guantanamo Bay, although the Pentagon said detainees will only get the vaccine after the “highest-priority troops and employees” are treated.

The Maryland Department of Public Safety and Correctional Services announced Thursday it had received the first shipment of a planned 1,900 doses of the vaccine. The doses were free, courtesy of the federal government.

The agency notes it has a “constitutional obligation” to provide health care to its detainees that meets “community standards,” and every year pays for and makes seasonal flu vaccines available to “high-risk” prisoners.

Here’s how the agency will divvy up the swine flu antidote:

Individuals have been identified in priority groups, both inmates and then staff that choose the option, to receive the vaccine through DPSCS as it becomes available. Priority groups for offender populations were identified by DPSCS based on similar standards to those in the community identified by the Center for Disease Control (CDC). They include those who are pregnant, those under the age of 24 with underlying health conditions, and those ages 25-64 with high risk health complications.

Additionally, 600 vaccines will be offered to staff “either permanently assigned to infirmaries or a medical transportation unit,” according to the agency’s press release.

Anyone out there want to channel Roy Blunt?

This morning, the Baltimore Maritime Museum and Port of Baltimore commemorated the 66th anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor aboard the United States Coast Guard Cutter Taney.

The USCGC Taney, the last surviving warship still afloat from the attack of Pearl Harbor, hosts one of the largest commemorations in the country annually on December 7th. Every year, survivors attend the ceremony to remember “the day that will live in infamy” and to share their personal accounts with others.

Above, WWII Pear Harbor survivors onboard the USCG Taney, left to right: Edward Robertson, Thomas Talbott, and Warren Coligny. Photos by Eric Stocklin.

We’re going to need more makeup artists in the future (high-def TV, you know). Financial advisors, too. By the year 2016, we’ll be crawling with ‘em.

At least, according to the Department of Labor, which released a 10-year forecast for the hottest 30 occupations in the near future.

Of note: information technology folks (of course), home health care workers (to care for aging Baby Boomers).

Of interest: theatrical and performance makeup artists, veterinarians and gaming surveillance officers.

Other expectations: minorities will make up a greater percentage of the workforce, and seniors will work longer.

Click here to read the full list.

-JACKIE SAUTER, Multimedia Editor 

Talk about shock value.

The St. Mary’s Today newspaper has run an ad announcing a “free coffin giveaway” to the first drunk driver to kill himself or herself this holiday season.

Editor Ken Rossignol, whose brother was killed by a drunk driver in 1975, has long crusaded against drinking and driving.

Here’s the text of the advertisement:
Free Coffin Giveaway to the 1st DRUNK DRIVER TO KILL THEMSELVES DURING THIS HOLIDAY DRINKING AND DRIVING SEASON! Tired of all the nagging of loved ones, stupid commercials from MADD, cops, judges and addiction counselors? Throw a final bender this Christmas and get a cheaper funeral by being the ST. MARY’S TODAY Christmas Party DWI Dead Driver Winner! We will throw in a FREE wooden coffin…however, you could just call a cab and save us the pile of scrap lumber.

As you can imagine, news outlets like WJLA, Newschannel 8 and USA Today have expressed interest in the story.

St. Mary’s Today also regularly prints the names of those arrested for Driving While Intoxicated in Southern Maryland.

Thanks to The Law & Lawyers Blog for the tip.

-JACKIE SAUTER, Multimedia Editor

Maryland driving instructor Michael Psenicska is suing the makers of the movie “Borat,” alleging that the producers lied to him about the motives for the film.

Psenicska, who is a high school math teacher in Baltimore, has owned a driving school in Perry Hall for 32 years. The lawsuit seeks $100,000 in compensatory damages and unspecified punitive damages.

From the AP:

Psenicska’s lawsuit says Fox and Cohen fraudulently induced him to sign documents approving his appearance in “Borat” just before he was filmed giving Cohen’s Borat Sagdiyev character a driving lesson.

Twentieth Century Fox spokesman Gregg Brilliant said Psenicska consented to the filming.

-JACKIE SAUTER, Multimedia Editor

Last week I was asked, “Are you a Maryland political insider?”

The query came from the Observer Media Group in the form of a promotional e-mail for PolitickerMD.com, a new online presence in a modest niche - Maryland government and politics.

The editor, “Wally Edge,” promises “original reporting, analysis, commentary, rumors” and more - covered “from Maryland by Marylanders.”

But here’s where it gets even more interesting: one local blogger isn’t so sure about the “local coverage.”

Adam Pagnucco writes on Maryland Politics Watch that the Observer Media Group, which also operates PoliticsNJ.com, is owned by Jared Kushner, a wealthy 20-something from New Jersey whose family has made a bundle in real estate. Kushner made headlines when he bought the New York Observer in 2006.

And New Jersey and Maryland aren’t the only Kushner-owned political blogs out there.

Pagnucco also notes the many campaign contributions that Kushner has made to politicians, mostly Democratic, especially New Jersey Gov. James McGreevey.

So what do you think? Are you a “Maryland political insider” and will you be checking out this Web site?

-JACKIE SAUTER, Multimedia Editor

A local radio DJ noted this morning that if the government ever decided to do away with waterboarding, the form of torture could easily be replaced by a snowy commute.

I’ve got two and a half hours, from Bethesda to Baltimore - but I know someone out there can beat that.

Did anyone have better luck with public transit?

-JACKIE SAUTER, Multimedia Editor

Here are a few law links for your blustery Monday morning:

-The Supremes won’t hear (PDF) Maryland v. Paulino (PDF), a.k.a. the buttocks case. That means the Court of Appeals’ decision stands; the court voted 4-3 in June to throw out the drug conviction of a man whose buttocks cleavage was searched by police at a car wash.

-A gay Iranian man from Rockville apparently faces deportation. According to an article in the Gay City News, Hassan Parhizkar’s immigration problems stem from him hiring a man he thought was a lawyer, but who was allegedly a con man posing as an attorney, to handle his initial claim for political asylum.

-17-year-olds can no longer vote in the Maryland primaries, complains WaPo letter-writer.

-A New York judge has pledged not to shave until state judges there, who make $136,000 a year and haven’t gotten a raise in nine years, get a salary hike.

-CARYN TAMBER, Legal Affairs Writer